Sunday, December 12, 2010


— n

1. a way of regarding situations, facts, etc, and judging their relative importance
2. the proper or accurate point of view or the ability to see it; objectivity: try to get some perspective on your troubles

3. the theory or art of suggesting three dimensions on a two-dimensional surface, in order to recreate the appearance and spatial relationships that objects or a scene in recession present to the eye
4. the appearance of objects, buildings, etc, relative to each other, as determined by their distance from the viewer, or the effects of this distance on their appearance
5. a view over some distance in space or time; vista; prospect
6. a picture showing perspective

My perspective is constantly changing.  In the morning I am trying to view things through my students' eyes, at night I am trying to understand my husband's point of view.  The way I look at a task is completely different than the way my brother, grandmother, mother, or even mother-in-law will interpret it.  My sister is 10 years younger than me so her outlook and my outlook are polar opposites.  My best friend, Stacy, is a mother and her perspective is now even more different from mine.
I lost a friend last week and it was more difficult to handle than I thought it would be.  This friend was a co-worker, a mentor, a leader, a counselor, and a supporter.  Though I have only known Mike Vitez since I began teaching this year, I have found his death to have overcome my thoughts this week.  Mike was from Pittsburgh and seeing as I am married to a Pitt Alum, Mike and I were instant friends.  Everyday we talked Steelers, football, and weather.  Mike was hosting his annual trip to New York in the spring for students and needed teacher chaperons. I instantly signed myself and my husband up because Mike was in charge and I knew it would be a great time. 
The sudden and unexpected death of a friend always causes me to pause and examine my perspective.  Unfortunately, Mike is not the first friend to pass away and I know he will not be the last.  Death has no prejudice and that's the scariest part of all.  When I found out that Mike had passed away I immediately called Ben to tell him the news and to tell him how much I love him.  I know I tell Ben 30 or 40 times a day that I love him, but is that enough?  How can I truly express to my husband that he is the world to me and that I would be lost without him?
Perspective.  It changes all the time.
3 years ago, I didn't know who Ben was and he didn't know me.  I was in graduate school and my plan was to become a teacher in South Carolina and hopefully meet a nice man.  Then I met Ben and he completely changed my perspective on love and relationships.  I realized after a few shorts months that Ben was the man I was going to marry and that my life would never be the same.  Ben gave me a new perspective on relationships.  On real relationships.  He taught me what it meant to really be in a relationship.  I can never thank him enough for that.
After this week of roller coaster emotions, there is one thing I am certain of:
Always tell someone you love them today, because they may not be here tomorrow.
Ben, I love you.

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